#5: does happiness have a smell?
click here for some happy thoughts. lord knows we need 'em.
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Hi! Hope you’re having the best Sunday :)
Thank you for your very encouraging and kind words regarding this newsletter on Instagram! It was so nice to read what you are enjoying so far. And who knew so many people liked lists (!!!).
I know I said last week was a week, but lately, hasn’t it felt like every week is just hard? Maybe it’s because there is never-ending overwhelming terrible news and constant climate battles all over our country/world (just to name a few). I’ve been trying to write some tried-and-true OOM essays for this newsletter again this week, and I have about five 50-85% half-finished pieces, but bro...gonna be honest, it’s just not fucking happening right now. Creativity and productivity is down, and I’m feeling completely and utterly burnt out (anyone else out there struggling too?). Kevin’s been hella busy with work, Rocky is demanding more of my energy than ever (and now taking super short naps, yay), and I’ve been pretty anxious about the current mandates. Like... really anxious. I’m trying to write about it, but I’m also not sure I want to engage in this debate online. *DEEP SIGH*
Note about my mental state: I texted my best friend and asked her if bangs would look good on me. So, yea...
Anyways, this week I’m doing another round of random thoughts, focused on happiness, because goddamnit, we all need all the happy thoughts right now. It seems like just about everyone around me, no matter which “side” they are on on the multitude of sides there are to take these days, we’re all feeling it.
Also, IRL update is back with some pictures of my week. And a new series called MOM TINGZ, named after one of my besties Elisha (go follow her, she’s the best), who always shares the best “mom tingz” in our group text. One of the main pieces of feedback I got from you all on Insta last weekend was more mom content. And while I have zero desire to be a mommy blogger, that request has been duly noted. So for those of you who don’t care about all the baby things, it’s at the end of this newsletter, so you can just leave the party early.
Ok, let’s get your day started on the right foot. Happy Sunday!
ONE LOVE,
Alex
In this week’s LET’S TALK: we discussed the overwhelming nature that is news lately. I’m all for being informed, but in its current format, is it sustainable?
“I don’t deny that it’s important to know what’s happening in the world. I guess for me, I just can’t deny the fact that our bodies are our homes and that space is where I choose to tune in before anything else.”
I can’t stop thinking about this comment by Jenny 🤯 body aka our home > everything
A list of random happy thoughts
1) the celebrity couple we didn’t know we needed 💦
You can keep MKG Fox. I’m going to obsess over Zoë and Magic Mike instead. I really can’t handle this new couple alert and it needs to be discussed. I haven’t even thought about Bennifer once this week and that hasn’t happened since May 10th when they were first spotted in Montana together.
First of all, fun fact about me, I am a die hard Lenny Kravitz fan. Calling all angels? 16-year-old me had this song on repeat for months (and I’ve watched this house tour an absurd amount of times… when he mentions the bedroom bathtub🤤). And then fast forward to when I saw this editorial of Zoë and I just about diedddd and went down a rabbit hole of every video I could find of her. She is the epitome of fucking cool. Even her acne is somehow cool. And I have never, not once, looked this cool at a grocery store. Also if this song isn’t on your summer jam playlist, I’m not sure we can be friends. And then there is this song too. And this song always gets me so hyped like I’m planning for my third divorce. Anddddd I guess I should mention Channing lol? I’m realizing while writing this that maybe I don’t care as much about him, and yet I’m obsessed with this couple. Where did they meet? How long have they known each other? Are they just friends? WHAT ARE THEY! I need more random couples like this to exist. So while I’m waiting for Chris Pine and Lizzo to be legit, let’s fantasize together. Any dope individuals we’d like to see dating? In the meantime, I stan Zoë. And if she’s dating Channing, I stan him too.
P.S. speaking of couples, Rihanna and A$AP are single handedly saving 2021.
2) does happiness have a smell? 🥺
I read this question on a comment the other day and I cannot stop thinking about it. Does it?! I think it might. When I think of what happiness smells like, I think of cut grass, lilies, the smell of my cat after she’s licked herself clean, the nervous energy at the arrival stand at any given airport, the sound of an ice cream truck, the smell of water in a running fountain on a hot summer’s day, the way your partner smells in the morning, the smell of leather, and Nicole Kidman finalizing her divorce (yes, not a smell, but damn that IS happiness). Even my baby’s puke? It’s weird. What does happiness smell like to you? Lmk in the comments.
3) my new favorite IG account 😶
4) am I old? 👵🏼
Three people, clearly in their early 20s, called me ma'am this week. And I don’t know how I feel about it. On one hand, I am very honored. Whenever I talk to Gen Z, I feel like a wise woman who has major knowledge to share. Maybe they sense they are in the presence of an elder in the making? But seriously, when I then process the term “ma’am”, I remember that I am almost middle aged and an actual adult (wtf), and it just doesn’t compute in my brain. Like sorry what?! Come again? Wasn’t I just barfing out of an Uber escalade after an all-nighter in LA like two seconds ago? Maybe this isn’t a happy thought, but I’m trying to embrace the fact that I value wisdom > youth any day of the week, even if our society doesn’t. That said, I’m having an existential crisis that these songs came out 20 years ago. TWENTY (!!!) WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. 00s jams SLAPPED tho.
5) the love story I was emotionally unequipped to process 💔🥺❤️
I was emotionally unequipped to find out about this love story. If you’re not on TikTok, there’s a current trend where your younger self asks your current self questions. It’s been unbearably emotional getting through the videos, but this one just puts the nail in my spiritual coffin. In short, this woman met a guy when she was 17 years old on vacation in Greece, and the universe brought them back together ten years later. *Move over Allie and Noah* This woman apparently reached out to him ten years later, they wrote to each other for a couple of years, and then finally re-met when she had a layover. They are now married and have children together(!!). One of the things she said to her younger self: “You’ll be in different relationships, and he will have his own life, but you’ll meet again when the time is right.” GUH, KILL ME NOW. Divine timing always makes me cry. Like when I think of the heartache I felt in wishing to be pregnant, and wanting to hold my baby in my arms, for three years, I now understand why it took so long. I’m so grateful for every step that brought me to Rocky. Sometimes it’s just not the right time. And then, suddenly, it is. Ugh ok. I'm crying. I thought these were supposed to be happy thoughts?! Love just gets me.
6) to my fellow imposter syndrome friends 🤔
7) a reminder that the 🌍 is good
The world can feel so bleak these days, but I want to remind you that the world is good. Our new neighbor told us that he is flying to New Orleans to volunteer as a chef to help those displaced because of the hurricane (this is what he chooses to do in retirement; helping strangers). Our new favorite barista, who has the most infectious joyful energy, drew this image down below of “our happy little family” on my to-go cup of coffee. A middle aged man offered up his truck when he overheard me trying to figure out how to transport a piece of furniture at a thrift shop. Another older man yelled at his 12-year-old grandson standing behind me at the Ace Hardware store after he saw me struggling with Rocky and my newly purchased items: “Dammit boy, go help that poor woman and carry this to her car.” The grandson’s name was Colton, and he told me Rocky was the cutest baby he’s ever seen. He even said, “She’s got a wonderful mom!” The world is burning and melting and everything feels like it’s ending, but here is your reminder: The world is a beautiful place and humans are inherently good. Everything is going to be okay. <3
IRL UPDATE
I’ve been anxious this past week, and then simultaneously very hopeful. It’s a weird mixed bag, and one that I think many people are going through right now. *ANOTHER DEEP SIGH* The only thing keeping me afloat is that Succession officially announced their season 3 start date and I cannot wait for more Tom and Greg banter. It’s the only thing that matters. Anyways, thanks for reading this far! Here are some random photos of my week. And for “MOM TINGZ”, read down below. Also, I can’t stop thinking about Meg Ryan fall. And thinking about the fact that this woman’s eye transformation caused an online frenzy and was the sole reason for this product to sell out on every damn website within hours of her posting. And it’s all I think about now. Did the brand just hand her a million dollar check? BECAUSE THEY SHOULD.
MOM TINGZ: baby food
Rocky is eating 2-3 meals a day now, and it’s messy fucking business. Besides the literal mess, no one prepared me for how terrifying feeding your child would be. The other day, we had a little scare with an apple, and Kevin looked at me with fear in his eyes and said, “She’s going to eat purees for the rest of her life because I can’t handle this.” And I agreed. Luckily, a lot of my friends are moms and have given me great advice, so I wanted to share what we’re currently doing food wise in hopes of helping some of you.
We have a baby CPR class scheduled next week. Though we’ve watched several YouTube videos on this, my friends told me the in-person classes were super beneficial and helped mitigate the immense anxiety that is feeding your baby food.
When I was in Mexico, I texted a friend about baby-led weaning: “So wait, do I have to do that?!” to which she responded, “Well, you can do whatever you want.” And that gave me so much permission to do what I intuitively feel Rocky is ready for, instead of what I’m seeing on Instagram. I definitely allow Rocky to feel and touch foods like avocados, but for the most part purees is what’s working best for us right now. We have been using Yumi and I can’t recommend this brand enough. I’m going to reach out to them to see if they can provide a code for you guys so BRB on that. Also, if you’re going to use pouches, I can’t recommend this brand enough, especially if you’re looking for a no-fruit option. An app that’s been really helpful regarding how to prepare food according to what age they are is Solid Starts. I don’t use it that often but it helps when I have no idea what I’m doing. I’m about to introduce liver to her, and basing a lot of what I give her to eat on TCM. Here’s an article I found helpful, if you’re interested in that.
Back to the messy business, this smock has been saving my life. Zero mess on her onesies anymore (it was driving me NUTS). Also, this is the high chair we have. And we’re obsessed with these spoons.
Mmmm happiness does have a smell. For me it’s the baby breath. The baby skin, and yes even the baby puke ( pre solids ) 🤪.
It’s also the fresh summer rain on the concrete pavement and the salty air of the ocean. I even love the smell of farmland and the wharf.. odd things I know but maybe it’s because I correlate so much of that to home..
it’s also landing in any island of Hawaii … something so beautiful about that smell.. lastly the smell of my partner … call it natural body odour or pheromones but I swear it’s a thing 🤪
Koa is on solids too! We’ve puréed most things since he only has 2 teeth and he can’t fully chew. He eats peas, carrots, blueberry, banana , avocado, kale, strawberries, yams.. his appetite is voracious .. he’ll eat most of any of this and a combo of any of that…
I actually find it so delicious and it reminds me of the simplicity of food and the clean taste of whole foods grown in the soil. So pure. One thing I find disgusting though is baby cereal. If I could post a photo of my kid eating here I would. His facial expressions discovering taste is everything 👌🏼
First of all - YES to posting recipes in the newsletter! Am always on the lookout for quick, easy and healthy recipes. I don't mind posting some too? Would be cool if we share our favorite recipes.
My happiness smells like beach in the early morning, fresh laundered sheets, cookies baking in stove, Oriana's smell of milk and bath soap and Anthony's deodorant :)
Totally feel you about "am I old?" I work in a college environment so seeing the students milling about makes me think "oh shit its been 16 years since I was a freshman student, strolling around around the campus, all fresh faced" lol but in hindsight being my age is nice, I have my shit together (most of time) stable financial situation, a place, a partner, a daughter and more confidence.
I am starting Oriana on food as well - its tougher than I thought! I would recommend for you to follow 2 IG accounts - blwmealsapp and kidfriendly.meals They have recipes, tips and more :) Like your friend said, do whatever you want. I am doing a combo of purees and solids. Gives me some peace of mind and a better transition for Oriana too I think. Best of luck! :)